Hi my name is Annie Yeager I am 28 years old and live in Paducah ky, I have 3 beautiful kids and 1 on the way. today I am in a really sad and confused mode! I love my kids with all my heart but always put things before them. It bothers me to know that my kids need me, but I was to busy choosing drugs, men, or friends instead of them. how do I cope?
I would say that questions of that magnitude should be put in front of a medical professional…
Most here are just struggling day to day to get by…For me it took over 10 years to find acceptance, and to this day I still see a medical professional for all my “problems”…and yes it has helped me immensely!
I wish you nothing but the best, and its never to late to change!
thank you dav for the advice it will be used
I think davOD is correct in that “…its never to late to change…”. If you can identify an issue, that’s the first step. Some people can’t even see the issue, so well done you!! And I again agree with davOD that your pcp is probably your best ‘first person’. They often have contacts and connections that they can refer you onto.
You’ll find that word ‘acceptance’ pop up often and personally the acceptance of things for myself is very fluid, it’s always changing. In some situations I can accept things easily, but at other times I find it impossible. In saying that though I must admit that as time goes by it is getting easier to accept. I don’t like it, that’s for $%^&#@ sure, but I can’t change it and that is something I am learning to accept. It’s all a learning experience.
It appears to me you are starving for acceptance and friendship with your own person. Now, with a TBI, self-acceptance can even be more tough and this unbearable reminder of our alienation from life. So I suggest you learn to let go of feelings of despair and hopelessness that may be feeding your lack of self-acceptance. I also suggest Yoga or meditation to help change this inner wound. Yoga or meditation helps to heal the moral injury and this hole is usually where drugs, alcohol, and others are used to fill in the hole. One of these practices will offer you a place to affirm yourself from within and form balanced relationships. It creates a peace where you will feel secure, acceptance and comfortable with yourself. Sufism is good at teaching self-affirmation, though it can be rather deep. Buddhism is more toward non-attachment and this offers a radical acceptance of life. So I suggest Yoga as I believe it will offer you an unshakable inner peace for your soul and then your own value can be without reference to anyone else.
Please do not have any grandiose expectations from one these practices, as it teaches there is no simple on-off switch to this hole. It just seems to teach acceptance and self-acceptance as the starting point in life. It builds a firm foundation for you within, then for children and others. And may you know your presence is significant and you have value regardless of your achievements.
thanks to both of u and ur advice! those are good ideas and I will try them out