It has been a long time since I’ve been on here. I remember the first year i came on here I was given so much support from people. One thing however that i have learned is, there is a big difference between talking about your injury and actually living with it. When mine happened 8 years ago that next year I became a person that i couldn’t recognize and to be honest i was okay with that. After that fateful day, i began to grow an urge to do something with this second life that i had been given. However, after so many years i have struggled to find the exact plan but in noo way am i giving up now! I have gone through 8 years of college and switched degrees 4 times as I continue to work towards an associates degree. All the while i still feel like a needle in a haystack but it does not phase me because i know one thing, this injury happened for a reason and eventually i will find out why.
Really pleased to see you’re still around and it’s great to hear from you again.
Due to the range of impairments that can occur due to a TBI that feeling of “…like a needle in a haystack…” is VERY common. Often the dr’s like to make us fit into a certain box or criteria, and when we don’t fit we can be left to flounder with no direct answers. Been there, done that. Hence ‘some’ of my angst with the medicos ‘We’re the dr’s, we know. You? you’re just the patient. You wouldn’t know…’ Grrr
A MASSIVE congratulations on your degree, that’s one hell of an accomplishment. To maintain that direction and dedication to your studies can be difficult for those without a TBI and that shows your determination to succeed. So well done you. (I’d say ‘Hats off to you’ but then you’d see all the holes in my head. YUCK ) It just goes to show nothing can hold us back and maybe that will be the inspiration someone else needs to continue on. That in itself could well be the reason why, inspiration can have a profound effect on others even when we don’t know about it ourselves.
This kind of injury tends to seperate the wheat from the chaff. I am now forty years past my first TBI and I can tell you that having a TBI is not a death sentance but it sure seperates those of us with guts from the winers and the quiters. Your life is what you make of it inspite of your injuries. I have more people reelying in me to get stuff done now then before I had my TBI and I figure out ways to get stuff done. Since I am medically retired because of this condition I am available to get stuff done where others are not. I am a cabin tract representative of a small tract to an larger organization that represents the largest single concentration of cabin owners in the United States. I am a fire prevention person with the national Firewise program and on the for my cabin tract an also one of four road board members. Because I own two crawlers I do the road work for the cabin tract. Last weekend was a watersystem work weekend and if I had not been there valves that needed replacing would not have been done in time to beat the last few days temperature drop. Just before I left the cabin Sunday I found a bad leak at a cabin and turned the water off and notified the cabin owner and the tract president that the water useage numbers should be back down and he did not have to organize a search party because I had found the leak…Wensday I am hauling up two tons of two inch rock chip to hopefully finish off one of the road drains…and I picked up a load of 120 gallon propane tanks and converted them to fire rings and gave them to the cabin owners that needed them. When snow hits I can slow down a bit.
Suffered temporal lobe damage after being attacked left me struggling with life basics. Told would be unlikely to return to work as a mechanic and need live under supervision for quite some time. Acknowledge there advice but I could handle being idle and in icolation requested permission to return to work even just for a 1or2 hours to just watch how life operates. Slowly increase my time and set challenges when there continued to push forward upping my hours and tasks. Basic mechanical jobs under supervision leading to doing jobs myself but get quality control check when completed. Didn’t stop and within just over 6 months I was doing basic jobs 40hrs a week 2 and half years on I’m back working at a level on par with others. Admit I have to structure my days approach tasks in different ways to make it less mentally challenging. As some days I clock out head home and I’m washed out. Aware dangers of overworking myself really analyse what went wrong those days to identify trigger moments that may be causing me issues of extra fatigue. Focus on becoming aware of potential trigger points don’t get caught out by them also check procedures I have put into my routines. Make every job that bit more effort but ensure complete correctly. Hopefully continue these ways of working eventually became less challenging and become automatic to me.
As support workers didn’t agree with me doing this I’ve been discharged understand there frustrations but I involve some of the advice as I move forward. Disappointed they couldn’t see that I felt this was my best way to cope. Work life is hard but feel I’ve got some control over it. Manage to mix with people and they are totally unaware my situation. Although I hold back next time I meet them as relaxed free flowing conversation I struggle to remember. my personal behaviour/attitude/control of my emotions and lack having a personality is Where I’m struggling don’t feel any consistency. As I say a lot unaware of my situation then slag me to others. Also have to tolerate so much passive judgement those who attacked me said I provoked it and police accepted there stories. As I had been drinking and was alone no evidence on my side. Breaks me when I’ve overheard them laughing and joking about it.